Climber jokes
What did one mountain climber say to the other mountain climber?
Man, you are really on edge.
Yesterday on the school bus my friend in front of me said she was 41% Irish and 15% Mexican.
Then my friend sitting next to me said, “Wow, almost half leprechaun!”
Then I said, “Yeah, and 15 percent wall climber!”
Me: *gives her 5 dollars* Climb that flag pole. Cute female: *takes the money and goes up the flag pole* Is this good? Me: Hell yeah, that's a nice view.
*Next day* Here's 10 dollars if you do it again. *She goes up there* Me: How's the view? *She goes home and her mom sees the money* Her mom: Where you getting this money? Her daughter: I climbed a flagpole. Her mom: You know he just wants you to see your panties, right? *She goes back and does it again but doesn't wear panties* Me: Holy shit ;-; Her mom: Did you do it again? Her daughter: Don't worry, Mom, he didn't get to see my panties. Her mom:...
What goes up and down but stays in the same place?
Stairs.
Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she earned $20 by climbing a tree. Her mom responded, "Maria, they just wanted to see your panties!" Maria replied, "See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!"
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
Why couldn't the kid go rock wall climbing?
Because every time he moved his leg upward, his prosthetic leg fell off.
Climb high, climb far,
Get high, get far.
Why did Sally not save the mountain climber?
Because it was her dad.
My step-dad works at a lumberjack company and he took me to work. I went climbing trees later that day and now I'm in the hospital.