Put jokes

What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?

Put them in a barking lot!

He probably picks hair off his dad’s dick, then probably puts it in his hair.

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a little boogie in it.

How do you know someone is fucking dumb?

They put jokes that have been used several times already.

Yo' mama is so stupid, she put a quarter in a parking meter and waited for her gumball.

My car fell in a ditch today. Didn't want any more cars falling, so I put a car-pet over it.

What’s the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair.

Sippin' on promethazine With lean, I fell in love.

I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup.

How do you know you’re at a gay cookout? They’re putting your sausage between two buns.

My phone is just like the Twin Towers; they got put in airplane mode.

I made a website for orphans, but it wouldn’t let me put a homepage.

I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee. The man said coffee was only a quarter. I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask-it.

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"

What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards?

DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!

Family are together playing charades.

Me: "50 Shades of Grey!" Yes, I'm so good at charades! Put your shirt back on, Nan!

Your mama so fat, when she put a leg in the car, the wheels deflated.

I put on my hazmat suit, and grabbed my equipment, and said, "My time to shine!"

What do you get when you put an ape's brain in a gorilla? A feminist!

You're so skinny that if I were to put you on a flagpole, you would wave in the wind.

Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.