What does it sound when a dragon sings? A fire alarm

Why did the orange go blind? Cause he was low on vitamin c

One day leaf asks mom, “mom, why am I named leaf?” Mom says “because when you were a baby a leaf fell on your head.” The next day feather asks mom “ mommy, why am I named feather?” Mom says “ when your were a baby a feather fell on your head.” The next day brick asks mom “rhsisvrkanx” mom says, shut up brick!

DON’T READ THIS IF YOU HAVE NOT PLAYED SETTLERS OF CATAN! “Wheat is going on?” I asked my godmother. She replied “Godson, I really don’t know but could you please get me some m-ore Shloer.” “Ok, I’ll sheep if there’s any in the fridge!”

I lent my sister my bed. The next morning, she told me it worked like a dream.

Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

What’s your favourite type of flour Don’t know Mines self raising

I tried my best to think of some puns, but I’m gonna have tibia honest: I don’t have any puns left, but I’m pretty sternum, so I’ll think of a few puns here and there. It took a lot of spine ro do this.

Two windmills were standing in a wind farm, one asked whats your favorite type of music, the other one replied… IM A BIG METAL FAN

Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium???

‘Cuz’ he made his home run

What do cats eat for breakfast???

mice krispies

Why did the credit card go to jail???

‘Cuz’ it was guilty as charged

if my cat was a cactus doesn’t that make him a catus?

What would the Mandolorian be called if it was made in an aquatic centre?


I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters but it just wouldn’t land with people…

I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters but it just wouldn’t land with people…

I know, I’m going to hell…

adding a ‘gl’ in front of camping doesn’t make it any better. if you add a ‘gl’ infront of adolf hitler it doesn’t make him a great guy

That is a “Penny-Farthing” bicycle, Dimes if you feed it beans.

Get confused with Confucius!

Where did Johnny go after he wandered into a minefield?