What do you call a disabled orphan?
A left over vegetables.
Puns
The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn't carrot all.
What dinosaur loves music?
The velociRAPtor!
My hips can't move, but Heineken.
My teacher started talking about houses, then I said I don't want that informansion.
Tell your teacher this: "I passed a test that took 60 minutes. It wasn't your work, it wasn't my work, it was hour work!"
I drew a fist on a body, and then I drew a guy saying to him, "That dude's a knucklehead!"
A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.
If Adolf starred in the Room, his most iconic line would be “I did not Hitler! I did not!”
Why didn't anyone care about the circus?
Because it was irr-elephant.
A dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
What's the city with the fastest growing population?
Ireland, cuz it's Dublin everyday!
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
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If I look after chickens, does that make me a chicken tender?
What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?
The location of the Dirtbag.
So there was this girl and her horse would not stop following her, so she said, "Stop horsing around!"
Get it? "Horse-ing."
Beth was from Spain and she had a pig. What did they call her?
Beth-la-ham
The cancer patient asked the doctor how many more months he had to live. The doctor replied, "Tu-more."
I've always wanted to WAVE to a dolphin, but it could never SEA me.
That dolphin is so WASHED up. WATER you say we get revenge?
