How do you plan a party in outer space?
You planet.
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Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.
When the Mexican wanted to go shopping,
he went to Ja-mall.
I hear coal mining is a rock-bottom job.
What place is Flo Rida from? Florida.
Why did the man say "hi" to say "bye?"
Hey, Hunger Games... I'm full!!
This ain't your mama's monologue.
Mom: Go water the plants.
Me: But it’s raining outside.
Mom: Go grab the umbrella.
Me: What???
Don't touch my pickles - they are very picklish.
What do you call a frozen Band-Aid?
Cool-Aid!
My bro said food was cool. So I threw a piece of cool chicken at him. For some reason, he hit me, OOF.
What did Saturday say on the day before Friday?
I’m thursty (Thursday).
Damn, DIN just went over me and I'm trying to figure out what it is. A camel's dick.
What did one statue say to another statue? "Hey! Is that you?"
Never trust a donkey; they are always full of shit.
I was going to invite your friends to your birthday, but they were all extinct.
You thought his puns were bad, wait till you sea mine!
Don't touch my bot.
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