Puns

Who betrayed Cheesus Christ?

Goudas.

Here's a good tree joke to spruce up your day!

Why did the first fence hate the other fence?

The second fence used some of-fensive language.

Wanna hear a pizza joke?

Never mind, it's too cheesy.

Last night I slipped on a banana.

My friend said it was a-peeling!

I forgot what lightning was. Then it struck me.

I was to go to space camp, but then I realized I had no space to learn.

My friend tried to sleep on napkins.

I guess that's why they're called NAP-kins.

My puns are awesome, pure gold.

Hey, guess what I got for my birthday.

No, what did you get? Older.

Some babies may be delivered via stork, but some bigger babies are gonna need a crane.

What do you call frozen web?

A web-cicle.

I'd tell you a joke about infinity, but I'm afraid it will never end.

What do you call a goldfish that got third place? A bronze fish.

I was asked to give a bicycle joke, but I couldn't...

I was two tired.

How did the inkjet printer kill himself?

He drank cyan-ide.

My friend told me I should be a stand up comedian but... I prefer sitting.

I met a drum circle once, they were a huge hit!

Why can't melons get married?

Because they cantaloupe.

The DNA told the tailor that he couldn't find his genes.