Puns

1111111111122222222

I hear coal mining is a rock-bottom job.

A depressed man was caught on top of the Empire State Building with marijuana. Needless to say, he didn't want to come down.

What do you call a pile of cats? A MEOW-tain.

A cowboy rides into a ranch on Sunday, stays three days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible?

Where can you never take an orphan to dinner?

Family restaurants.

What is Thanos's favorite video game?

Pokémon Snap.

Don't touch my bot.

I may not be that good with puns on this site, but I got a skele-ton of jokes. Hey, what's the matter pal, is there something crawling under your skin?

What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?

Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"

Succcccc.

I know people don’t really like cat puns, but mine are PURRety good.

Did you CATch that one? No? Because you are in a bad mood? You should WISKER those feelings away. We should PAWnder ways to fix your mood. Just remember to keep CLAWing at the problem. I am glad I can help MEW.

What does a glass of water ask a pond?

"Water you doing?"

What does the pond answer?

"Pondering life."

I would say a good joke, but all the good ones Argon.

Bob: Kanye West.

Dad: No, but I can East.

My cat got in a fight. It was a catastrophe.

I used to work at a bank, then I lost interest.

Why is it poetic when they have plenty of those German sandals in the store? Because they're Birkenstock.

What do you call a frozen Band-Aid?

Cool-Aid!

What do you say to toast with bad shoes?

"Butter those."