Wordplay

This is 15 first-year treating a swan.

Students return: "Without payment?"

The word "I die with many important problems."

Later, you answer this point: "DSD, rats?"

Crowbar

Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.

Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.

Nun

What activity do nuns and whores have in common?

Answer: Genuflection.

Fish

Why did that fish cross the road?

Just for the halibut (hell of it)!

Target

I learned that a strangler was targeting me.

All I could think was, "You’ve got to be choking me!"

Knock

Pete: Knock, knock...

Paul: Who's there?

Pete: Boo...

Paul: Boo who?

Pete: Don't cry, it was only a joke!

Paul: I'm going to cry! It was such a bad joke!!!

Fence

Why did the first fence hate the other fence?

The second fence used some of-fensive language.

Napkin

My friend tried to sleep on napkins.

I guess that's why they're called NAP-kins.