Puns
Pete: Knock, knock...
Paul: Who's there?
Pete: Boo...
Paul: Boo who?
Pete: Don't cry, it was only a joke!
Paul: I'm going to cry! It was such a bad joke!!!
Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?
- Sure.
Oh sorry, I'm still working on it :-]
Why can't you play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
You have been a bad boy, so now I will have to pun-ish you!
If you're cleaning a vacuum cleaner, does that make you the vacuum cleaner?
Who do you call to clean up foul language?
A cuss-todian!
Yeoooo.
What do hospitals do when they receive donor organs? They organize them.
What do you call a fish that can use a katana?
A salmon-rai.
What do you call a goldfish that got third place? A bronze fish.
No, I don't want to.
Why did the man yell at the other? To tell a pun.
Sauron said, "Eye see all."
Why did that fish cross the road?
Just for the halibut (hell of it)!
I learned that a strangler was targeting me.
All I could think was, "You’ve got to be choking me!"
Why can't melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe.
The DNA told the tailor that he couldn't find his genes.
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!
I carried a magnet, then people found me very attracting.
Hey, guess what I got for my birthday.
No, what did you get? Older.