Vacuum Cleaner

Vacuum Cleaner jokes

Blonde

What's a similarity between blondes and a vacuum cleaner?

You have to turn them on before they start to suck.

Difference

What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?

The location of the Dirtbag.

Memes

Vacuum

If you're cleaning a vacuum cleaner, does that make you the vacuum cleaner?

Salesman

Answering a knock at my door, I see a vacuum cleaner salesman who proceeds to tip a huge bucket of shit all over my carpet, before proclaiming any trace this hoover doesn't remove I will personally eat myself.

"Well, I hope you're hungry," I replied, "'cause they cut off my electric this morning!"

Bleach

Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.

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  • Dishwasher

    What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? You slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.

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  • Man

    Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex.

    They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.

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  • Community

    Do not put your penis in a vacuum cleaner. Please do not insert your penis into a vacuum cleaner.

    For starters, the vacuum cleaner might be dirty. It's likely that there might be dirt, dust, and bacteria that could cause an infection if they come into contact with sensitive tissues.

    The vacuum cleaner is also dry. The penis is meant to be moist, and a vacuum cleaner with high suction power could chafe some of the d… Read more