Puns
What's the difference between the Grand Canyon and a blonde?
The Grand Canyon is a busy ditch.
What did the shoe say to the other shoe?
Nothing, it was tied up in another conversation.
What did the rainbow say to the other rainbow?
Nothing, it was feeling blue.
What's the difference between a snow woman and snow man?
Snowballs.
My friend's daughter is taking a job in California parking cars. She says she wants to be a valet girl. For sure. For sure.
Me: That’s a good WAVE.
Friend: I SEA it.
Wave: Doesn't break for us to surf on.
Me: I was SHORE it would be good.
Friend: I SEA what you did there.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.
Want to hear a joke? Look at the Miami Dolphins football record.
I can't see the bee.
It's by the beehive.
My god, my egg jokes are eggcellent!
Where does a crayon go on vacation? To color-ado.
Why would a dead guy lie?
Because he can't stand up.
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
What do you get when someone named Victoria falls? A Victoria Falls!
Jeffy: I need a new butt. My old one has a crack in it.
Hey, what's the puniest pun you can come up with?
Man, cancer is so easy to beat. I'm already on stage 4.
What happens when a pun isn’t funny?
It gets PUNished.
What time should you go to bed when it's bedtime?
*insert pun here*