Josh
Puns
Need an arch? I Noah guy.
My dick itches.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get the Chinese Daily!
Get it? I don't either--I get the New York Times!
What do you call a girl that likes reading? Page.
A cat gets its tail run over, and its mother assured him it’ll be okay. “You just have to stay PAW-sitive!”
The mother was later killed in her sleep because her son hates puns. At the funeral, one of her daughters said, “You have CAT to be KITTEN me right MEOW!”
Guess who dies next.
Why are mountains always tired? Because they don't Everest.
No, I don't want to.
What's Thanos' favorite game?
Half-life.
Yeet.
My friend gave me sugar for my birthday. She thought it was cheap; I thought it was pretty sweet.
What did the lungs say to the cigar?
"You take my breath away..."
What do you call high Mexicans?
Baked beans ;)
My sister thinks she's so smart. She said, "Onions are the only food that makes you cry." So I threw a coconut at her.
I once had an owl who I thought it would fly away.
Some moving men had just begun their day's work.
The first thing they brought into the house was a huge couch.
The owner came in and asked how everything was going. They replied, "Sofa so good."
What happens when a skeleton does not laugh at your pun?
Looks like someone's funny bone is broken. 😁
If a wizard gets robbed by a muggle, has he been muggled?
Two antennas met on a roof and got married.
The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was incredible.
John Cabot was the first to explore the Coast of Labrador. After he left, he realized that he had forgotten something and had to go back to get whatever it was. This made him the first Labrador Retriever.
