Punch jokes
Why did the fruit punch say "What's sup?"
He was so naughty!
You can slap, punch, knock out an orphan, what will they do? They don't have parents!
What did the orphan do when he got punched?
Nothing, because his parents weren't there! :)
My gf told me she was pregnant. So I punched her in the stomach.
She asked me "Why the hell did you do that?!?!?" "I wanted to let you know I'm pro abortion."
If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.
Me at the Oscars when I see Jada Pinkett Smith, I said: "G.I. Jane 2, more like G.I. Jada 2, can't wait to see it."
So Will Smith is laughing and then suddenly, Will Smith walks up to me and punches me in the face.
Me: "Ow, oh, wow. Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.” My nigga Smith goes: "KEEP MY WIFE'S NAME OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" Me: "Maybe you should focus on keeping her friends out of hers."
So I walk into a bar, and there’s people waiting in line to punch me in the face.
That’s the punch line.
What kind of punch do little kids give to other little kids? The Sandy Hook.
What takes 10 seconds to go SLPAT! on the ground?
9/11 victim!
Little William punched Little Johnny in the face. Then Little Johnny says, "If you do that again, I'm gonna turn your fucking nuts into coconut juice."
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
Your mom's so fat that One Punch Man had to take two punches.
If you're bored, just punch an orphan. It's not like they can tell their parents.
I’d tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I only remember the punch line.
A man walks into a bar, and there is a line of people waiting to punch him.
Yeah, that was the punchline.
Want to know what I do in my freetime?
Punch an orphan, cuz what are they going to do, tell their mom?
I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”
That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.
Shame on you Penaldo!
Yo mama's such a milf, she deserves a tongue punch in the fart box.
So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.
And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.
What do my little brother and a vagina have in common?
They both ooze blood 🩸 when punched.