Prostitution jokes

Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"

Woman: "Sure."

Man: "How about for ten dollars?"

Woman: "What do you think I am?"

Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."

What do you call a dinosaur that loves sucking dino dick?

Sucks-alota-cocka-sorass.

What’s the difference between a chromosome and a hormone?

You can hear a hormone.

What do you call a whore with a runny nose?

...Full!

A teacher in Scunthorpe asks a class what their favorite football team is, saying, "Raise your hand if it is Scunthorpe." Every student but one raised their hand. The teacher asks, "Why don't you support Scunthorpe?" The child answers, "My parents support Grimsby, and so do I." The teacher comes back with, "Why are you copying your parents? What if your mum was a prostitute and your dad a druggie?" The child answers, "Then I'd support Scunthorpe like you dirty bastards!"

What is a prostitute's favorite form of traffic control?

Speed humps.

Why did the hooker fall in love? Stockholm syndrome.

What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.

What do you call a Russian prostitute? Slobadown Mycockyoubitch.

What do JFK’s killer and a prostitute have in common?

“They both blow heads.”

What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy?

The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt, and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.

A man is meeting a client in Japan, but arrives a day early. When night hit, he went out with a prostitute. They're having sex, but the prostitute kept shouting "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!", so the man thinks he's doing a good job. The next day, the man meets his client and they go golfing, and the client gets a hole in one. The man praises him by going "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!". His client turns around confused and says, "What do you mean wrong hole!?"

What is the best type of girl to fuck?

Homeless girls, because after, you can drop them off anywhere.

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a Twinkie?

Nothing. They both squirt their white stuff when you eat it.

What is the difference between a feminist and a female prostitute? If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.

what is the difference between a basement full of dead prostitutes and a bowling ball in the basement?

I don't bowl.

What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?

The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...

What's the difference between a hooker and a burrito?

I don't eat burritos.

What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?

Cash and carry.

How can you compare a gay prostitute to Pacman?

They both get paid to eat 200 balls!