Prostitution Jokes

I went to find someone to fuck in the streets for money, and I found a prostitute but then she raped me. After she said it was amazing and instead let me push

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player? A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.

What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?

A Sandy Hooker


Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner." The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus. The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz. The third lady says, "I never had a husband." The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo." They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying. The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse." "How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"


What present can a pimp always buy his hoes to both show how much he thinks of them and know they can never get enough of?


What is the difference between whores and nuns?

Nuns usually discover their own chosen vocation. Whores usually have their vocation chosen by pimps.

I seen your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing. Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.

How many hooker's fit in a Cadillac? About 4 in the trunk if you stack em right

What do you call it when a prostitute pays someone 5 bucks to fuck them?

5 dollar foot longs

What's the difference between a prostitute and a trash bag? There's a limit to how much trash goes in the trash bag.