Prostitution Jokes

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer.

The prostitute can wash her “crack” and sell it again.

What’s the difference between a bullet, and a prostitute? They both burst a barrel.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

This lady has 2 parrots that only say one thing. Hi we're prostitutes, wanna have some fun? So she goes and tells her pastor. He responds with I have two parrots as well, they are always praying and they have everything that a parrot needs to be a christian. Maybe if we put our parrots together, mine will fix yours. They proceed to do so and the lady's parrots say hi we're prostitutes, wanna have some fun? and the pastors parrots reply with Johnny drop your beads and lift your heads our prayers have been answered.

What do you call 2 nuns and a prostitute that play football?

2 tight ends and a wide receiver

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

The Drunk and a priest

On a bus, a priest sat next to a drunk who was struggling to read a newspaper.

Suddenly, with a slurred voice, the drunk asked the priest:

"Do you know what arthritis is?"

The parish priest soon thought of taking the opportunity to lecture the drunk and replied:

"It's a disease caused by sinful and unruly life: excess, consumption of alcohol, drugs, marijuana, crack, and certainly lost women, prostitutes, promiscuity, sex, binges and other things I dare not say."

The drunk widened his eyes, shut up and continued reading the newspaper.

A little later the priest, thinking that he had been too hard on the drunk, tried to soften:

"How long have you had arthritis?"

"I don't have arthritis! It says here in the paper that the Pope has it."

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

How many hooker's fit in a Cadillac? About 4 in the trunk if you stack em right

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Husband and wife get into a fight wife says “go blow off some steam I’ll let you fuck a hooker” so he does that comes back and says “I’m off the hook now”

My friend jokingly confessed to me she did prostitution. (Consentual)

She wasn't joking. :0

We are 15....

What do you call prostitute in a wheelchair?

Hot wheels.

What do you call an Eskimo stripper?

A frosty-tute.

so my dad walks into a bar and there was a hooker and a child i was with him and they both approached us and they said only £50 for head but it was a little weird that the child was talking to my dad and the hooker was talking to me i was about to say something but my dad pushed me over and my friends uncle killed my dad . the kid was never seen again . her name was Madeleine McCann i think im the only one who knows where she is but overall the head from the hooker was good