Prostitution jokes
Q. Why did the pimp buy a journal?
A. To organize his thots.
Girl: "Dad."
Dad: "Do I love you?"
Girl: "I am a prostitute."
Dad: "Yes."
Woman 2: "Dad."
Dad: "Right?"
Woman 2: "I'm a woman too."
Father: "God, do you love children?"
Boy: "Yes..."
My friend is a pimp.
I think he's having an existential crisis. Lately, he just wants to be alone with his thots.
What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?
Your job still sucks!
What’s the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One kneels for salvation.
The other kneels with salivation.
What's the best name for a prostitute?
SI-MOAN.
If a prostitute is celebrating her birthday, does she get a hoecake?
What is the difference between a male prostitute who is a Democrat and a male prostitute who is a Republican?
When Republicans perform fellatio for money, it is called prostitution, but when Democrats perform fellatio for money, it is called a donation to their political campaign.
Why can't you kill a hooker?
Because they're dead inside anyway.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A Democrat will keep screwing you when you run out of money.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A prostitute will stop screwing you when you run out of money.
What is an example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.
When prostitutes misbehave, do their pimps make them stand out on the corner with a "For Rent" sign on their crotch?
I have no problem with prostitution.
It's like an Air BnB for your dick.
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.
A teenage boy decides to go see a hooker for the first time and asks his experienced uncle for some tips.
"Uncle, what should I do about the hooker name? Should I ask her real name or should I come up with a name for her myself?"
"Kid, I've been fucking hookers for 20 years and I didn't even know they had names."
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One kneels to pray, one kneels to pay.
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One says, "God is my father." The other says, "Who's the father and who is my son?"
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.