Problem jokes
1+1? Too hard.
"How does dry skin affect you at work?""You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it."
Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
When he asked who the best composer was, they all replied, "Bach, Bach, Bach."
Why was Hitler broke?
The gas prices are outrageous.
Why do orphans not like cereal? Because their dad never came back with milk.
Yo hairline caused corruption.
Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?
Their parents never say yes.
Sex is like math.
Subtract the clothes, add the bed, divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.
Do you know why orphans can't play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why couldn’t the booty be on social media?
It had too many FOLLOWERS behind it.
If you ever get mad, just hit an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Today, there was a big test for Little Timmy. During the test, Timmy had to take a really huge shit. So, he rushed to the bathroom. He took a while in there.
When he was done, he realized there was no more toilet paper left. Since there was nothing around him to use, the only thing he could do was wipe with his hand. His time in the bathroom was up, and he needed to finish that test! He didn’t have time to wash his hands. So, he hurried back. The problem was, the hand he wiped with was his right hand. He used his left hand to complete the test, which made him fail. When he got home, his mother was standing there crossing her arms. “Timmy, the teacher had called and said you wrote sloppy on your test. Why is that?” Timmy replied, “Oh, it’s because I caught a leprechaun with my right hand, but if I opened it, my classmates would scare him away, so I had to use my left.” Timmy’s mother glared at him with disbelief. “Timmy, I don’t believe you. Now open your hand!” Timmy did so and opened his hand. “See, mother? I said you’d scare the shit out of him!”
Joe mama so fat when she weighs herself, the weigh explodes.
Is laughing a problem?
Laughing at what?
I want to jump.
Jump—what?
Jump off the hook.
Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
Because they have no body to go with.
Q: You have problems, I think your disease is BOOFA.
Q: What boofa?
A: Boofa deez nuts in yo mouth!
Orphan, why can’t I watch a PG movie?
Because they are Parental Guidance.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!
When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.
Why do orphans hate baseball so much?
Because they can't run home.