President jokes
Biden is a joke. Trump is AMAZINGLY AWESOME!
Once I went to a museum and overheard someone speaking to an employee for information.
"These are lying clocks; they tell how many lies a person tells."
"Oh, cool."
"This is Mother Teresa's clock; the clock hasn't moved because she never lied."
"Makes sense."
"This is Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands only moved twice, indicating he only lied twice."
"Where's Trump's clock?"
"Oh, we're using it as a ceiling fan."
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it's so true.
We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now we have Biden, no cash, and no hope.
Bill Clinton is no longer playing the saxophone.
He is now playing the whore-monica.
I, for one, give President Joe Biden my full support, and anything else he can find in my previously rented gym locker. 🤣
Roses are red, Obama is well spoken, I'm sorry sir, but the ice cream machine is broken.
Why does Joe Biden like cold weather? Because he’s used to being in the teens.
What does Joe Biden say to young girls when he leaves the room?
"Smell ya later!"
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
"Have you driven through Dealey Plaza? It will blow your mind."
~John F. Kennedy
Which president has never gone to jail?
Lincoln because he's innocent in a cent, get it?
Why is Trump always in debt? His university isn't paid off yet!
Have you seen the inside of Ford's Theatre? It will blow your mind. ~Abraham Lincoln
What do you get when you mix Harry Houdini, a basketball, and the 17th president?
Magic Johnson.
Joe Biden doesn’t follow his own f**king mask mandate.
Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.
I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
What's Trump's favorite instrument?
A TRUMPet!!!
Somebody told me to go to hell, so I walked up to Donald Trump.
President Chumples memorialised Charlie Kirk by saying, "He had a real shot at being president."
That's not a joke. The fat fuck actually said that after pan face got shot.