President jokes
What did Obama ask Trump?
How do you find out about the accomplishments of the former president of the United States James Earl Carter?
Read the label on the jar of Skippy peanut butter.
Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?
Because orange is the new black.
Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high-ranking position in the US government?
Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
Donald Trump has been banned from Panera.
Memes
What's Christian and holey?
JFK.
Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.
Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.
Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?
Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!
Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump?
Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!
A man dies and goes to Heaven. He sees a bunch of clocks and asks Jesus what they are for. He replied they are gauges, and that they move when people lie. He said that Mother Teresa's has moved twice, Abraham Lincoln's once, and George Washington's never.
The man asks to see the current president's, and Jesus just laughs and says that Joe Biden's is the one keeping the hurricanes to speed.
Hillary Clinton is elected president...
And on the first night she spends in the White House, she is visited by the ghost of George Washington. She asks him, "George, what can I do to best serve the United States?"
The ghost of George Washington responds, "Never tell a lie."
She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."
The next night, she is visited by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson. She asks him, "Thomas, what can I do to best serve the United States?"
The ghost of Thomas Jefferson responds, "Listen to the people."
She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."
On the third night, she is visited by the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. She asks him, "Abraham, what can I do to best serve the United States?"
The ghost of Abraham Lincoln responds, "Go see a play."
What do Joe Biden and orphans have in common?
No one loves them!
Donald Trump is getting all the perks of 2020. He got COVID and lost his job.
Joe Biden
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
Why did Joe Biden go to the hospital? Because he couldn't stop Putin.
Like if you're voting Trump 2024! WOOOOO!
Joe Biden is the first president in history to have a vice president on record claiming they believed sexual harassment allegations against him.
I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big elephant in the room!
What is Trump's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)
Which president has never gone to jail?
Lincoln because he's innocent in a cent, get it?
If Trump colored his hair green and wore an orange shirt and pants, I will call him a carrot.