If you think of a president as your king, then the USA got checkmated on November 22nd, 1963.
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
Do you think John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head because his wife said he was close-minded?
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
A woman's age is harder to get than the President's phone number.
What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?
Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!
Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.
Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"
If Donald Trump had sex with an orange, guess what his son would be?
An orange tree! :>
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.”
“I still don't get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, "OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!"
Texans: Don't mess with Texas.
*snows 1 inch*
Texans: Please help us, President Biden!
Why is it that the Libertarian Party never had a formal president of the united states that ran as a Libertarian that had a presidential library? Because the Libertarian Party is the party of principle, the Libertarian Party was founded in 1971 and the Libertarian Party has not won a presidential election since 1972, because the Libertarian Party doesn't believe in using force to achieved political and social goals
👏 👍👍 👌 👌 👏 🙌 💪💪😁
What is the similarity between Pink Floyd and Donald Trump:
The best thing they did was a wall.
An assassin is about to shoot his target, "I'm about to give you the JFK experience."
What do you call the United States of America under a Joe Biden presidency?
Answer: The Democratic People’s Socialist States of America. We're still America, just a different kind of America. And that’s no joke. 😔
I was voting for Trump in the 2016 election. It's been a while since the last presidential assassination...
Joe Biden said he was going to a petting zoo.
Trump said schools are not petting zoos.
Why didn't Biden get the virus?
He sniffed everyone!
I would like to thank my favorite President Barack Obama. Sorry, Barack Obama and my uncle Obama bin Laden. I mean Osama bin Laden. Sorry, hummus in my throat.
If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.
Roses are red, Obama is well spoken, I'm sorry sir, but the ice cream machine is broken.
