Preference jokes
I like my women thick, so if they aren't over 375 pounds, they're not stepping into my room.
Sex is like pizza.
When it’s hot, it’s great.
When it’s cold, it’s still pretty good.
Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?
They hate it when you hand it to them.
Dark humor is like food; some people get it, others don't...
A man gets on a bus and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun.
"Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you."
The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her.
"Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise.
"Ha, ha! I'm the man from the bus!"
"Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume. "I'm the bus driver!"
What is a computer's favorite snack? Cookies!
According to statistics, 5 of 6 people enjoy gang rape.
Would you rather eat a brick or a matter baby?
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
What kind of woman does Bill Cosby like the most? The “cold and passed out” kind.
Why do French people like to eat snails so much?
They can't stand fast food.
Mary had a little lamb.
Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!
I like this joke.
Why do skeletons like having sex with short girls before eating?
They like to bone a petite.
A bully chokes me. I simply say, "Joke's on you, I like being choked!"
Why are theaters popular among cows?
They enjoy watching moovies.
I like big butts in the Kent, la la "hehehe" SUS.
How many rapists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Punchline: One, but they prefer soda bottles instead.
What's an orphan's least favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
What’s the difference between a gay rooster and a straight rooster?
A straight rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-do!"
A gay rooster says, "Any cock will do!"