Preference jokes

I say we shouldn’t do any jokes about dogs cause dogs are the best, but cats suck.

Why don't terrorists like Walmart?

They prefer a Target.

I like my women like I like my scotch:

12 years old and mixed with coke.

I like my women how I like my bacon.

Well Dunn!!!

If it does more than pee, it's too old for me!

Why would a vegetarian never moan during sex?

They don't wanna admit that a piece of meat made them happy.

Would you rather get a massage from a man or get major surgery from a woman?

Why didn’t the autistic boy like Minecraft?

There was a new texture pack.

How do you know you had a gay cookout?

All the hotdogs taste like ass.

A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?

Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.

Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?

Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.

I like my women how I like my scotch: 11 years old and mixed with Coke.

💪 💪 🏋️‍♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?

Cum Junkie.

Why do physically disabled gay men like performing blowjobs on well-endowed, abled-bodied gay men?

Because physically disabled gay men prefer eating pepperoni than eating sausage links for dinner 🍽

What do rocks and girls have in common?

The flat ones get skipped.

How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly?

If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.

What does broccoli and sex have in common?

If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.

"Yo mama so bad we gotta switch to yo papa."

What do Civil War veterans and pedophiles have in common?

They both prefer Minnie (mini) balls.

Sex is like pizza.

When it’s hot, it’s great.

When it’s cold, it’s still pretty good.