Politics jokes
What's Osama Bin Laden's favorite song currently?
"Under the Sea" by The Little Mermaid!
A guy walks up to me and says, "I wonder if the hookman is real?"
I reply saying, "Yeah, it's Asa Hutchinson, lol."
Why is American bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
JFK
Half is definitely a bottom.
What's Osama Bin Laden's favorite drink?
A double Manhattan.
Obama has dih.
But the Twin Towers just had a hard landing.
What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?
They both talk like they're on fent.
World leaders are so old, they've got nostalgia for the Cambrian explosion.
What did Joe Biden say when he got pulled over?
I'm just a-Biden the law, officer.
If Adolf starred in the Room, his most iconic line would be “I did not Hitler! I did not!”
What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are white Christian nationalists?
They both thank you for your financial support.
Hitler was a nazi.
What's the difference between George Bush and Donald Trump?
One is into airline security, and one is into wall, turrets, and rockets.
What's the similarity between George Bush and Donald Trump?
It just doesn't work...
"Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head."
- JFK
If you think of a president as your king, then the USA got checkmated on November 22nd, 1963.
Why did Joe Biden visit Hiroshima? Because the city has the hottest prepubescent girls in the world.
Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump?
Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!
JFK and Abe Lincoln were some of the most open-minded presidents ever.
My country is so corrupt that it voted me as the most sexiest man.
Victory assured, I will continue like that till I'm six feet under.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A Democrat will keep screwing you when you run out of money.