Politics

Politics jokes

A man dies and goes to Heaven. He sees a bunch of clocks and asks Jesus what they are for. He replied they are gauges, and that they move when people lie. He said that Mother Teresa's has moved twice, Abraham Lincoln's once, and George Washington's never.

The man asks to see the current president's, and Jesus just laughs and says that Joe Biden's is the one keeping the hurricanes to speed.

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  • People are really upset with the Trump-Biden debate.

    So much so, that Chris Wallace has requested to change his name.

    Me: You know what's the favorite slogan that Hindus like the most?

    My friend: What?

    Me: “kati supari kata paan katiyo ko bhejo pakistan.”

    What do U.S. airstrikes and dark humor have in common?

    They're normally pointed towards Africa and the Middle East.

    Once I was in South Korea doing stand up comedy... and I started with a "hidden" joke and I said: "I'm so happy to be here in one of the most beautiful Korea's in the world..." which is a good joke but they didn't get it, and they looked at me badly... so I said "I'm here in the South which is more beautiful... South good, North booooooo." But still nothing, they kept glaring at me... then I realized that maybe I was in the wrong Korea.

    If you own a gun and you live in the USA, hide your gun upstairs. Biden can't get it.

    Biden: *falls over on steps*

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  • What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?

    The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.

    What would you call the previous president when he is having a bad day?

    Donald Grump.