Politics

Politics jokes

People

  • I was asking people who knew Trump if he would win a second term. Stormy said, "No way, he doesn't have two in him!"

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  • Divorce

  • British MP Sally Ann Hart has filed for divorce citing sexual unfulfillment.

    Her husband couldn't fuck her the way her stupidity could.

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  • Switch

  • So one day, I took a trip to Russia and saw Vladimir Putin walking in the streets without any bodyguards. Seeing as how I looked just like him, we switched places for a few days.

    After two days, some officer came up to me and asked if we were going to project блять, and I said yes, and the officer said, "God help us."

    So a day later, I heard on the news that every other continent and the moon were destroyed. I then approached the officer and said, "I thought you meant we were having a giant orgy." He said, "We did, and that we were extremely drunk."

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  • Orphan

  • If Trump was an orphan, I know he would know not to build a wall because he was in one most of his life.

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  • Border

  • I was going from Germany to Austria, and I accidentally crossed the border illegally. When the police caught me, they told me I was a Nazi. I asked them, "Why?" They said I didn't see the border.

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  • Cabinet

  • Trump's cabinet are like panties. Some crawl up your butt, some snap under pressure, and some actually cover your butt when you need them.

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  • Food

  • Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids.

    "Knuckle babies" don't eat.