Politics jokes
Labor party.
WWG1WGA.
Trump 2024!
Someone at my school the other day said that whoever killed Hitler was a hero. Who's going to tell him?
Only a city council committee would create this mistake.
Put a fucking playground next to a shitty sewer!
Trump's coming back.
Yes, yes~.
Trump's coming back!
In the morning at 6:30 AM,
Teacher: Who fought in World War I?
Me: Trump & Biden.
Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.
After school,
Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.
"She looks at her clock."
Teacher: And now I am sewed.
In America, you catch Pikachu. In Soviet Russia, Pikachu catches you.
In America, you find Waldo.
In Soviet Russia, Waldo finds you.
I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.
What Did Iran Say To Oman?
"Oh man, I ran out of ideas!"
Why did the democrats come out of the closet as assholes after they found out that Rush Limbaugh died? Because they don't fear him anymore.
Why did the Democrats act like an asshole when Rush Limbaugh was alive?
Because they fear him.
The Trump family are flying from New York to DC when Donald looks down on the cities below.
Trump: "I think I’ll throw a $1000 bill out the window and make some American happy."
Melania: "Oh honey, why not throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten Americans happy?"
Ivanka: "Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out the window and make 100 people happy."
Pilot: "Why don’t you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?"
Well, we've removed all of the excess fat from your body, and all that's left, I'm afraid, is the wig, Mrs. Trump.
Seriously, who wants fucking Annoying Orange as president?
My mind was blown when I saw all the people waving at me.
-JFK
You know Thomas Paine, right? Well, clearly he had some common sense too, right?
JFK's wife trying to grab his head be like "him in heaven." Why did I marrei her? Welp, time for a devorsin'.
What does a Russian do for entertainment?
A nuclear world fair.
Why are Americans such good chess players?
Because they lost two towers.