Theres a kid named little Johnny who would always cuss. Well one day, he was sitting in class and the teacher said "lets play a game". so the game was she calls out a letter and someone raises her hand and tells her a word that begins with that letter. teacher says "A" little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher thinks to herself "well he might say something like a$$" so the teacher calls on sally. sally say "apple". the teacher says "B" little Johnny raises his hand. the teacher though "no he might say something like b!tch". so the teacher goes all the way to R. the teacher says "R" little Johnny raises his hand and say "me me please I really know one". then the teacher thinks to herself "well theres no cuss word that starts with R" so she said "ok Johnny give me a word that starts with R" little Johnny says "a rat!" and the teacher very pleased say "very good Johnny what type of rat" little Johnny says "A big gosh damn mother freaker". sorry I had to edit some word but y'all know what I meant.
So there's a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says "Step on a crack and you break your mother's back,". The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother's back breaking. The little girl's father looks in terror, she then says "step on a line and you break your father's spine,". The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out "OW MY SPINE,". The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.
I love telling stories as theatrical plays. When we had a free dress day near Christmas my teacher dressed up as a reindeer, so I got my teacher involved...and shot her.
Mom, can I please go out and play?
... no answer
So there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, what is one plus one? She said I HATE YOU. Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN! Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said 85 SMACK EM DOWN! Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, My buns are burning. Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principal’s office. The principal yelled, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! Bobby said, NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN! The principal yelled, HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?! Then he said, 85 SMACK EM DOWN! Then he walked away from the principal’s office and said, my buns are burning.
I asked a French man if he played videogames, and he said, "Wii!"
Why did the tiger loose at poker? Answer: Because he was playing with a cheetah.
what happens when you are playing undertale but its snowy in town? it SNOW-d in town!
What did the depressed kid do in P.E play with the Jump Rope but they used it the wrong way
Playing Russian roulette alone means you're bound to be a winner eventually
Q: why do orphans love playing tennis A: bc the ball comes back
Dad: here u go son all ur toys have gone to the orphanage Son: why dad Dad:you would be bored there if there was not anything to do
What game do emo kids love the most Hang man
Why don’t orphans play baseball? Because they don’t know where home is.
When Michael Jackson died people melted him down into lego pieces so that little kids could play with him instead.
A blind man walks into a woman’s bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says before you tell your joke you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols, do you still want to tell that joke cowboy. He thought for a second and said not if I have to explain it five times.
