Play jokes
Play dead, they said.
Wasn't too hard.
I've been dead inside for years.
Why can't British people play chess?
Because they lost their queen.
Playing Russian roulette alone means you're bound to be a winner eventually.
I saw a little boy playing alone in the street. I told him that was a bad idea, then asked for his parents.
God, orphanages are fun to work at!!
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Memes
What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?
Tic-tac-toe.
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Q: Why doesn't Jesus play hockey?
A: He hates getting nailed to the boards.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They can't find home.
Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.
He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"
She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."
I was born and raised in Newcastle.
My grandfather used to tell me stories about Penaldo, a goblin from Portugal that travels to England when Newcastle is playing. He scores a tapin and then disappears until the next Newcastle game. I still have nightmares that he’s in our stadium.
What's the difference between soccer and a dead baby?
I don't wear steel cap boots when I play soccer.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
Why is a brick always hard? Because the Indians played with it enough.
Why can’t orphans play GTA and get five stars? Because they’re not wanted!
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
Why do orphans play GTA?
Because they need to know what it’s like to be wanted.
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Your mama is so fat that when she was playing online, she crashed the whole server.
Son: Hey Dad, can I play Fortnite?
Dad: I don't know, do you want a girlfriend?