Planet jokes

Your momma is so fat, the whole Earth falls down to 100,000,000 ft.

I lost all faith in humanity. I am moving to Uranus; it's really big. I might get lost.

Ur mom is so fat that she has her own gravitational field. She attracts everything around her, from planets to asteroids to comets. She is the center of the solar system, and the sun is just one of her many satellites. She is so massive that she bends space and time, creating wormholes and black holes. She is the ultimate cosmic phenomenon, and no one can escape her pull.

Ur mom is so old that she witnessed the Big Bang. She was there when the universe was born, and she has seen it all. She knows the secrets of the cosmos, and she has lived through every epoch and era. She has watched stars form and die, galaxies collide and merge, and civilizations rise and fall. She is the oldest living being in existence, and she has more wisdom than anyone can imagine.

Ur mom is so ugly that she scares away aliens. She is the reason why we have never made contact with extraterrestrial life. They have seen her face and they have fled in terror. They have warned their fellow species to avoid Earth at all costs, because it is inhabited by a monstrous creature that defies all logic and beauty. She is the ultimate deterrent for invasion, and she has saved humanity from countless alien invasions.

Latest news: a new planet has appeared close to Uranus.

Once the aliens was gonna have a party, they had to planet.

What's a homo's favorite planet?

Uranus.

I just overheard this but:

How do you make a party in space?

You planet.

If Earth is the 3rd planet from the sun, does that mean that every country is a 3rd world country?

Your hairline is so big, it counts as its own planet.

Yo mama so fat that when she sits around the earth, she sits around the earth.

Yo mama so fat, when she had an interview for NASA, they said, "We don't hire planets."

Earth is fun and worstbmaa.

Why is Mercury so hot? I know, because the sun is killing Mercury.

Yo mama so fat that when she was in Uranus, she picked her butthole.

What do you call a fat chink?

Saturn.

You never told me you were part orangutan. Have you considered taking a vacation to Planet of the Apes?

Me: Name all the planets.

Other person: Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Neptune, Mercury, Uranus.

Me: Not my anus!

What is the gassiest planet? Uranus.

Henry jas Mercury in Uranus.

You can’t land on Uranus XD