Planet jokes
Why did the rapper go to space?
Because he wanted to drop some INTERGALACTIC BARS!
Yo forehead so big, NASA needed it for the new planet, stupid!
What music do Astronauts listen to?
Nep-tunes.
Henry jas Mercury in Uranus.
The whole solar system is one big family, right? But everyone circles the sun.
Flat Earther pickup line: "The Earth may be flat, but Uranus is round."
What's the grossest mission NASA could do?
Probing Uranus.
What did the sun say to the Earth?
"Am I hot?"
Hey, look, it's Uranus coming from the sky!
There's gonna be 8 planets right after I destroy Uranus.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES space?
Snoop Star.
Uranus is larger than Neptune, but Neptune is more massive/heavier. (Fact not joke, also Neptune, don't kill me!)
Earth is full. Go home!
Your mom is so fat that she made the earth flat.
Why is mercury like everything else in the world?
Because it gives you cancer.
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"
What would Earth say if it had a boyfriend?
You need to com-it.
Yo mama so fat, when she had an interview for NASA, they said, "We don't hire planets."
Jo mama so fat that when aliens invaded earth, they said, "Wow, two in one!"
Gay person to girl: What’s your favorite planet?
Girl: Penus-(penis)(venus), and what is yours?
Gay person: What else, it's Your Anus (Uranus)!😅