Planet jokes
What do you call a rapper who LOVES space?
Snoop Star.
Your hairline is so far back, scientists consider it a ninth planet.
So, Dad is teaching his 8-year-old son about the planets and said, "This is Uranus." Then the 5-year-old son says, "Where is my anus?"
I always knew that Maranda Sings was orbiting Uranus.
Kid: Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?
Kid 2: Why?
Kid: 'Cause it's as short as your dick.
My sister every morning
What is Saturn's favorite song?
"7 Rings."
Why is there a hole in Uranus?
What would Earth say if it had a boyfriend?
You need to com-it.
I heard that Uranus is pronounced "yuuranus," but it reminded me of urine! 😆
Phobos and Deimos are just asteroids in moon costumes, and Mars was blind due to its frequent sandstorms, so it let Phobos and Deimos be its moons.
Don’t kill the Earth, it’s the only one with beer.
Uranus be like, "Oh look, I'm Uranus. Imagine how disgusted I feel."
Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.
I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.
You're so fat, when you jumped, the whole planet wiggled.
Why did the rapper go to space?
Because he wanted to drop some INTERGALACTIC BARS!
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet.
Why is Jupiter so big? Because it works out!
Why is the world split in half? Because fat people are weighing the Earth down.
Hey, I never knew we had a planet in our body!
Global warming will kill every single person on this planet.
It's a good thing I'm married.