Pilot jokes
What did the helicopter say?
Helicopter: "Kobe!"
I would like to remind all passengers that this is a no-smoking flight, although do feel free to join me in the cockpit, where we've opened a window.
Who crashed the plane?
1. Abu Faram? - terrorist
2. The little kid Joseph?
3. The passed out pilot?
Or Jamal?
Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.
I was gonna tell you a Kobe Bryant joke.
But it would just crash and burn.
They asked JFK Jr. if he wanted to shower before his flight. He said, "No, I'll just wash up on shore!"
A hired gun gets on a private plane to his next contract. Halfway through the trip, he notices the plane rapidly losing altitude. So he opens that back of the plane and starts tossing out everything he doesn't need: grenades, guns, ammo—unless it was bolted down, it went out. He stopped throwing things out when the plane started to regain altitude.
When the plane lands, he sees some kids giggling on the side of the road. "What's so funny?" he asks.
"Daddy farted and the house blew up," said a singed little boy.
Why did the chicken cross the towers?
Because he ordered a plane pizza and didn’t get to the other side.
What are the similarities of GTA V and 9/11? A plane can be stolen and crashed into a building by a bunch of terrorists.
My dad was in 9/11, that's rude, and he was a great pilot.
Chuck Norris one-shot down a German fighter plane by pointing his finger at it and yelling "bang!"
Who are the fastest readers on Earth?
The pilots flying the 9/11 planes. They went through 6 stories in 5 seconds.
POV: You are a passenger on September 11th, 2001, and you see the pilots wearing a Muslim turban.
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could fly a plane.
Who reads the fastest?
The pilot of the plane who hit one of the twin towers. He took out 83 stories in one go.
The reason why in the US their emergency number is 911 is because of my uncle Mohamed, RIP, best pilot ever.
Stop making 9/11 jokes, guys! My uncle died in that event. He was the best Arabian pilot in the world!
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
I told my friend to fly a plane,
But he threw a ramp off a roof.
Imperial Pilot: What do you think about the new Tie fighter?
Palpatine: Flew it.