Physics jokes
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because it was a very large mammal; its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to Heaven, I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to Hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down!
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
He couldn’t climb the stairway.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad husband?
Because he doesn't stand up for his wife.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, "I'm hit! I think I've lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" asks the other.
"I'm positive!"
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Yes, because a house doesn’t jump.
I read a book on anti-gravity...
It was impossible to put down.
"Wheel" all miss him, right?
Atom
Electron
What do Stephen Hawking and the Wicked Witch have in common?
If you throw water over them, they both die...
I set fiya to the rain! Wait, no, that ain't possible, what... I evaporated the rain!
I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it hit me!
The reason why Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
The reason Stephen Hawking died is because he drove too far from the wall. The cord unplugged.
The reason Stephen Hawking died is because he drove too far away from the wall; the cord unplugged.
Looks like I lost an electron, I should keep a better ion them.
The reason he died is that they accidentally flipped the wrong light switch.
Zaine Davis and Stephen Hawking fuck each others brains out.