Philosophy jokes
A: Who can tell me a joke?
B: Life.
Just because you‘re suicidal, you don‘t have to be a quitter.
Wait, actually.
I was going to kill myself, but in the end, it doesn't even matter.
People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.
"Confucius say, man who has mosquito on balls truly understands nonviolence."
You know Thomas Paine, right? Well, clearly he had some common sense too, right?
"The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Jack Sparrow
Life asked death, "Why do people choose you over me?"
Death replied, "Because you're the beautiful lie, and I'm the painful truth."
"Buy a man an airplane ticket, he will fly once. Throw a man off an airplane and he will fly for the rest of his life."
- Sun Tzu
What did a bee who was interested in philosophy say?
"To bee or not to bee."
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.
What does a Chinese guy say to the love of his life?
"You're the ying to my yang!"
I don't want to die.
They say nothing is impossible, but I've been doing nothing all day.
Have you ever heard of a dream that that that that the universe was a fake machine?
I think about my life, and then I think about death. I prefer death. If you ask me, life is just a time when you die. Basically, death is life, meaningless 0-0.
I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again, but if life is a labyrinth, I'd always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favorite...
Not a joke; just a statement:
Everything on here is unoriginal! 😂 But just because every word on here is unoriginal, it doesn’t change the way we feel. Our feelings are the only thing that is original because our feelings are our own. Even though others have the same or similar feelings! Our feelings are still our own. And sharing those feelings with words spoken from another just means we are NOT ALONE in our feelings.
This is not really a joke, but it's a question.
If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?