Personal jokes

Here are some skeleton jokes.

You know the average person tries too hard and works himself to the bone.

If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone, I can give you a real humorous joke.

I used to play the trumpet, now I play the xylo-bone.

I'm always happy; nothing gets under my skin.

I made you some turkey for lunch. Bone appetit!

I'm glad I had you; I'm no longer bonely.

I've got a skele-ton of more jokes, but I'm just giving you one more.

Did you hear about the skeleton ninja? He was very skullful (skillful)!

So, a bus crashes, killing everyone on the bus, and God feels so bad that He gives each one a wish.

The first person comes up, and she wants to be beautiful, so God makes her beautiful, and she goes into Heaven. The next person comes up, and he says, "I want to be beautiful as well." As this goes on, the last man in the back begins laughing a little, everyone becoming beautiful, until God asked the last person what they want, and he said, "I want everyone in front of me to be ugly again!" So God had to call the based department and gave him everything that last guy wanted.

Name one person who would take an orphan?

Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.

Are people too thick to realize the difference between a fruit, a vegetable, and a person?

My grandfather was the type of person who never threw anything away.

He died in World War II holding on to a hand grenade.

Bro sat down too close for comfort. I told him to move or he would get hurt.

Come on, how hard could it possibly be To move a few inches? You’re touching my D.

A guy really needs his personal space. Disobey and I’ll shove it in your face.

Why can't there be a gay disabled person?

Because a fruit can't be the same as a vegetable.

How do you kill a spider?

Just get an autistic person.

What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?

Dry Vegetable.

Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”

Person 2: “Seven.”

Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”

Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”

(Based on an encounter I had recently)

Person: Did you hear about the black chick on the front of the bus?

Friend: No?

Person: Exactly.

The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:

"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"

Did you know that Jeffrey Dahmer was the first person to try Five Guys?

How do you piss off a color blind person?

Give them a Rubik's cube.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a Black person? One gets paid, the other got enslaved.

If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?

They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.

Why did the man miss the funeral?

He wasn’t a mourning person.

As a brother, I have to report my sister has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great personality.

What do you call a bald person on fire?

A fried egg.

What is a disabled person's favorite type of comedy? Sit-down comedy!