Person jokes

"I’m going through a lot of things right now," I said frustratedly to the person on the line as I crashed straight through the next building in my car.

Why did the orphan cry to the teacher? Because they have no one else.

Kendon is a loser!

If you looked in the mirror, you would see an ugly person, which is you.

This is about Gwen.

I don't know her, but people are just causing too much drama over one person who never said one thing to them.

I would like to say that Jace, I disagree with you a lot, and I think you’re a very delusional person.

Person: Hey, do you know what's the best thing in life?

...

You do realize that I said nothing, right?

Me: Exactly :)

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get on the person's face.

Ben 10 and a disabled person are the same, but no aliens for the disabled person.

Yo mama is so ugly, even the ugliest person in the world looked like a sword standing next to her.

The person next to me on my flight was shocked when they found out I was Arabian. I lagged so hard my gerber almost fell out of my pocket.

I made someone a PB and J sandwich... they died.

Who are you?

Yourself.

What did Caesar call a person?

She-Caesar.

Potters are dead xoxoxoxoxox.

You're so skinny that people can't even see you.

Boosterthon asks to raise up to $35,000.

I donate $35,000. I ask, "What's my prize?" Boosterthon worker says, "Here's a headband." Me: "I donated the goal, so is that it?" Boosterthon worker: "No, it's $35,000 per person." I pass out. Boosterthon worker goes back to work like it is a regular day.

What do you call a pedophile who's dying? You.

Me sees crazy man hit a old poor person. Me dials 911.

Police: What is that location?

Me: I don't know where is dis location.

Police: Mission failed, we will try again later.

Me: WTH?

Police: Ends call.

Me: Calls hospital.

Hospital: What is that location?

Me: I don't know where is dis location.

Hospital: Mission failed, we will try again later.

Me: WTH IS HAPPENDS EVERY TIME NOW EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE.

Hospital: Hangs up.

Me: Calls fire dEpArTmEnT.

Fire: No fire.

Fire dEpArTmEnT: What is that location?

Me: Hangs up and give up and goes home.

Alex Hayermann.