Person jokes
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
I am really gay. I just needed to confess this.
A married woman gets hit by a truck, and the cops tell her husband:
Cop: "Sir, it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."
Man: "I know, but she has a great personality."
Ali A's face.
You should never leave a man hanging.
Unless they are still alive.
What do you call a person with no arms or legs lying face first in a river? Bob.
What do you call two people with no arms or legs standing in front of a window? Curt and Rod.
Person 1: How the freak did you get in my house?!?! I locked the door!!!
Person 2: But I'm your mom... I have a key. You dumbass.
His favorite drink was his dribble.
What's Stephen Hawking's shampoo?
Head and Shoulders. š
If you are dehydrated, you should get well soon.
Why canāt you high five a Japanese person?
Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like "it's an elevator, not a lift" and "it's chips, not crisps" etc. After a while of this, the British person calmly retorted, "they're schools, not shooting ranges."
Gun control in America is perfect the way it is, because the other day my daughter was seeing a boy and i caught them in bed. Then i pulled out my shotgun and nearly shot him. As he was running away I shouted " The only person allowed to f*ck my daughter is me!".
Rules of Dark humor:
1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.
2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.
3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.
I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.
- Sincerely, Zane
What do you call a person who tries to get you on a dating website... a Brodie.
Your momma!
A blind person walks into a bar.
Because they canāt see where they are going.
If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it, would they be kicking or hitting you?
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
I was trying to make friends, and this one person came up to me. They said, "Lettuce be friends?" I just laughed and said that was tear-able.