Person jokes
Person 1: Hi, I am Tom, and you?
Person 2: Andrew?
What's the difference between a Black person and a white person?
Black people don't shoot up schools.
There was a person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
I got a heart pain then I went to [the] hospital. When the doctor says I am dead, but I run then I jump. I am not dead!
Why did the mushroom go to the party??
Because he was a fungi!
What do you say when a Spanish person loses a car?
Carlos.
What happens when you combine candy and dick? That creepy guy down the street!
Kate: Can we have a threesome?
Trevor: Sure.
The lights go off and Trevor starts doing what he's supposed to be doing, and then he feels something going up his back end. He goes to punch the person behind him, but then he turns on the light, and it was Kate behind him, and he's been fucking the guy the whole time.
Evan David Sandri is gay and he is adopted.
Me: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Person: Why?
Me: Because he wanted to.
What do you call a Mexican without a car?
Carlos.
Why did the person go to jail?
He committed a crime.
Bully: You are a piece of shit.
Person: No, I'm not a piece, and I'm not brown... so no, honey.
When someone says, "Jesus," I say, "Bitch, where?"
My name is Gunter.
P = Person (not original "pun")
P1: Hey girl! P2: I got a bf! P1: Well, I got a Lamborghini Aventador, a Bugatti Super Sports, a yacht, and a private plane. P2: BF stand for breakfast. P2: Oh, and also, where did you get all that stuff? P1: GTA5 P2: You motherfucker!!!
(Communications with this person are now blocked)
What do you call a tall, affluent person? A big success.
30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven. God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way. The first lady, she was obsessed with her looks, so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish. The next person didn't know what to wish for, so they wished for the same thing. The guy in the very back was laughing, having a grand old time. Then God got to the person before the last. He said the same, he wished to be beautiful. When God got to the last person, he said, "I want them all to be ugly again."
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite food?
His shoulder.
Why does the disabled person scrunch his toilet paper up? Because that’s the way he rolls.