Perception jokes

Me: "You wanna see my dad?"

Some kid: "Yeah?"

Me: "Close your eyes and he will appear."

Some kid: "He ain't appearing."

Me: "Sorry I thought he would appear for you. He won't appear for me."

*The kid laughs*

Moral: Not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on. 🙃

You are the joke.

Dark jokes aren't funny... I can't see them at all.

How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants, her ass.

I once was sitting outside and watched the birds go by. I checked my watch and said, "My, how time is FLYING by!"

Look in a mirror.

Why are blind people gay?

Cause.

Your mum is so fat that when she looks in the mirror, the mirror cracked!

Spell "I cup."

I see you pee.

God said, “Let there be light,” so it beamed off your forehead, and so I turned into Stevie Wonder and called it night.

"I was walking in the yard yesterday and a bug stepped on me. Why, you ask? Because the bug didn't know I was there."

If this is offensive to anyone, I'm sorry! Hey, wanna see something funny? Go look in your mirror!

Water, tastes that one tap in school:

A tier water at 3 am.

S tier.

12 pm water f tier.

Have you ever seen a blind man swim?

No.

Neither has he.

If every time someone faints when they see your face and I get 1 cent, I would be a trillionaire.

One time you walked up to a mirror, but it’s shattered because of your reflection.

You're so ugly that if you looked in the mirror, you would walk into the light.

Ted stinks!

Why can’t the blind man see?

He just can’t see. 🫤

What do you call staring stares?

Stares.