Last night I remember partying with friends to find blood on my nightstand. Moments after I scolded my friends to put my alarm clock back where they found it.
So me and my friend dressed as dead people for halloween only difference in costume was he was dead
i hooked up with the groom at my uncle's wedding
Why Didnt The Skeleton Go To Prom?
He Was Dead. You Fool. You Fell For My Trick. Im Very Heartless-
Oh Wait
YOU FOOL-
People are like taquila glasses
you gotta shoot them down fast
Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender?
A: Nothing! He was hung over.
When the school shooter throws a smoke bomb into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it's a dance party.
a dad asked his son what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday and he replied... hows about a urinal cake?!!
What did the math teacher write on his party invitations? Be there or B2
What happened when the 400+ women ate a slice of cake. She died the next weekend.
A funny joke scenario Person 1: Why didn't he skeleton go to the dance?
Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.
Person 1: Because he was ugly fat and nobody liked him
why did the skeleton not go the ball? Because he had no body to go with
How do you plane a party in space? you have to planet
Why did'nt the skeleton go to the dance party because he had NOBODY to dance with
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend. Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, the sharks are not even bothering him! And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
we are drunk at the party, there was an A S S ton of drunk girls there with me..
What do you call a wild party in a bamboo forest? Panda-monium!
My favorite toast for parties:
May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I'm dead.
A boy went to a costume party with a girl on his back. Someone asked his what he was suppose to be. He answered," A turtle." 'Then why do you have a girl on your back?" the guy asked again. The boy answered, " it's Michelle."
Did you know ghosts are alcoholics They only come out for the Booz
