Paper

Paper jokes

Letter

  • After getting in the White House, D. Trump gets a letter...

    ...from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it:

    370HSSV 0773H

    All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren't able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter.

    One of the agents suggests Trump ask for MI6's help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary:

    "Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down."

  • 5
  • Wife

  • My wife wanted a boob job. I told her it was too expensive.

    I told her all she has to do is take some toilet paper and rub it in between her boobs for a few days, and they would get bigger. She asked, "How is that supposed to work?"

    I replied, "I don't know how it works, but it did a heck of a job on your ass!"

  • 0
  • Toilet Paper

  • I see how it is y’all be buying toilet paper, stocking up from the Coronavirus, but where on the symptoms does it say diarrhea? Lol, why y’all be buying toilet paper, now I am just confused.

  • 8
  • Dollar

  • One dollar bill is with a five dollar bill. The five says, "I make more cents than you."

    Doctor

  • A girl was going through some really bad health issues at her house. It got so bad that she had to be rushed to the hospital.

    Her husband found out about this after work and went to check on her. When he got there, the desk lady immediately pointed down the hall to a doctor. The guy walked up to the doctor, "Are you the one taking care of my wife?" The doctor glanced away from his papers, "Yes, that would be me, but I am afraid that she is in very bad condition. I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that she will have to be wheeled around in a wheelchair. Also, she can't eat normally. Taking care of her will become very hard. Basically, it will be like taking care of a big baby." Shocked, the guy says, "Wait, if that's the bad news, than what is the good news?" The doctor goes, "I'm just kidding with you, she died!"

  • 0
  • Death

  • When I die I want to have a piece of paper near me giving a clue on how I died, like, "I want everyone to miss me except for this bullet," or, "You didn't hang with me but guess what did?"

    Loser

  • What’s the difference between a loser and a paper?

    A girl actually dates the paper.

  • 1
  • Toilet Paper

  • 🤔 What do Polish people 🇵🇱 🇵🇱 🇵🇱 in Poland do with 📰 📰 📰 📰 newspapers 📰 📰 📰 📰 after they are done reading them?

    Use them for toilet paper. 🧻 🧻 🧻 🧻 😆 😄

  • 0