One random YouTube comment in 2018: "Soon, a virus will come to Earth."
A year later: "Pahahahahah that comment is fake lmaoooo ahahahha!"
Another year later: "Time to die a painful death."
Another year later: "God has come with the cure!"
One Jokes
Doctor, Doctor, I discovered one of the base pairs in my genetic code is erroneously a stop codon?
Nonsense! That shouldn't be happening!
One day I went skating and skated for so long that my feet were incredibly sore.
It was like my skates were moving all by themselves, but I decided to just roll with the situation.
A delivery service called “Ross Deliveries” was known to be the best in town. They never got anything wrong. One day, Rachelle got a delivery, but when it arrived, it was all broken! How is this possible?
I never said which delivery service she used. Lol.
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
A twin engine has two engines.
If one engine stops, the other will have just enough power to get the plane to the scene of the accident.
One word. Creeper.
What's one thing that you can say about a train, but not your girlfriend?
Shower thought: If everyone had schizophrenia, no one would know we had schizophrenia or know what it is!
Normally the reason you don't get a knife when you ask for one is because the person you asked is emo.
I was at a funeral. I kissed a hot girl I did not know. She was the one that died.
One time, I was making a caramel apple.
When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!
There is a ghost baseball game and one team loses because of one player so they start booing him!
I was in my car listening to my radio. Steve Winwood's song came on, "Just Roll With It, Baby." I said that must be one of Stephen Hawking's favorite songs; he sings it to his girlfriend.
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on one.
Orphan: I want to be a relator.
Teacher: Why?
Orphan: Because I never had one in my childhood.
When someone falls, you say to them, "I remember when I started to learn to walk."
When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"
She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD
How did pioneers name Canada?
They put a bunch of letters in a hat and pulled out three. The first one was "C, eh?" The second one was "N, eh?" The last letter was "D, eh?"
That's how they named "C, eh? N, eh? D, eh?"
What did one canyon say to the other?
You stay here, I'm gonna rise up on ahead.
