One jokes
What is the best part of twenty-one year olds?
There's twenty of them.
What's the difference between America and a flash drive?
One is USA and the other is USB! 😂😂😂
How can you tell the difference between a Christian priest and a zit?
One waits until you're twelve to come on your face.
What's the difference between cancer and me?
My dad didn't beat cancer... Whelp, I guess I stole that one.
My Bff: Hey do want any coffee?
Me: Yeh, of course.
My Bff: Ok which one?
Me: You know... the black one.
Me: Like my soul...
My Bff: Jeez you ok?
That one
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."😳
Why can't orphans have sex?
They do not have anyone to call "daddy."
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well." My brother said, "You want a sugar cookie?"
In middle school, we had to create words with magnet letters. Some kid laid the word "Animal Therapist". I changed one space and got sent home :/
You know the stupid trend where people say it’s ok to be overly obese? Healthy even? That you should take pride in it? Which idiots started that movement?
Well. We know one thing for sure. They were obviously members of a wider community.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
I was really rooting to tell that one.
Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up?
Because if they slept with both legs up, they would fall over!
What do you call a burger 🍔 with one eye?
A one giant.
The top worst thing for an orphan, and probably the most awkward one, is when they're having sex and the other person is calling them "mommy" or "daddy."
Me: Looks like a girl, sure as h3ll I don't sound like one.
Michael Jackson: Looks like a boy, sure as h3ll don't sound like one.
That [is] what we have i[n] commen, but if you mix up my gender I won't give a F about it. Michael Jackson not so much : )
There is no god. None, not one.
Pilot: This is my last flight, everyone.
Passengers: *Clap*
Pilot: I became a pilot for one reason: To conquer my greatest fear.
Flight Attendant: And what is that?
Pilot: Dying alone. *speeds up towards Twin Towers*
Also the Pilot: Now who is ready to play some Jen---
What do you call your sister who only has one leg?
Ei-lean.
Why do orphans not know how to spell?
Because no one likes them, dumb people. 🤭🤡