I went on a one in a lifetime vacation. Never again!
One Jokes
What did one Koala say to the other?
"Help me I'm burning. Aaaugh!!! Oh fuck oh fuck I'm on fire!! AAAAaugh!"
A man once ate the left side of a person. One guy watching asked if the guy he was eating was okay. The man eating him said, "No... it's okay, he's all right now."
1. You're so dumb, you think Cheerios are donut seeds!
2. You're so fat, you could sell shade!
3. You're just like coconut water, nobody likes you!
4. Have you been shopping lately? Because they're selling lives around the corner, you should go get one!
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence!!
Are these good?
My Bff: Hey do want any coffee?
Me: Yeh, of course.
My Bff: Ok which one?
Me: You know... the black one.
Me: Like my soul...
My Bff: Jeez you ok?
The butt quack one.
What has two names and one big home?
A person.
What is a plane ✈️ that can not fly?
A fake one ☝️
So what is the difference between a real doctor and a doctor of philosophy?
One cures the sick and the other makes them sick!
What can you not ride with two wheelchairs? A burger 🍔 one wheelchair.
What is a bus ride that is dumb? A boring one.
What is a bus driver that does not work? A useless one!
Last night I burned down an orphanage.
There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
What did one cat say to the other? Happy "meow"!
What do you call a burger 🍔 with one eye?
A one giant.
What did one nut say to the other nut? "Help!"
Me: I'm sorry, Aaron.
Aaron: Why?
Me: Your parents couldn't be bothered to look past page one in the big book of baby names.
Are butt cheeks one word, or should I spread them apart?
How come Christmas is one time? Because it is so nice!
