One jokes
What is Green and Red and goes round and round?
A frog in a blender.
(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)
What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?
One can support an average family.
What did one tampon say to the other tampon?
Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches!
One time a man climbed a mountain and saw a guy.
"Who are you?"
"I am mountain man!"
The only profession where one could have coronavirus and still go to work is a suicide terrorist.
I had two boxes: one Roblox, one Xbox.
I ain't shaking anyone's hand, not because of the Coronavirus... I ain't shaking anyone's hand because y'all out of toilet paper!
Why are people mass buying toilet paper because of the coronavirus?
When someone sneezes, everyone shits their pants.
Why do Indians gamble so much? They are hoping to one day reclaim their land.
What rock has four men that don't sing?
One Direction.
I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.
Here are some rules to make a good joke:
1: Don't say “my life.”
2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.
3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).
Question: What is the difference between a morbid joke and a dark joke?
Answer: One is 10 babies in a trash can; the other is a baby in 10 trash cans.
One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
There was once a kid named Timmy. His father and mother went to bed one night and didn't hear or see Timmy come with them.
They all get under the covers. Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood-curdling scream. "MOMMY, WATCH OUT! THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!" And he proceeds to say, "DON'T WORRY MOMMY, I'LL GET IT!" And he takes his father's penis in his mouth and chomps down.
Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.
What is the difference between a human and a tree and a house? Is for dinner today after school today after I have school 🏫 I have for kids dinner 🍴 was that I had dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night is what time it when we went and get the dog 🐶 night and dinner 🍴 night I love 💕 it is the one ☝️ I did not have time today.
My sister and I were hanging out when she opened her drawer and pulled out 3 condoms and said, "Pick one."
Q: What did one koala say to the other? A: How's it hanging? 😂
If you're ever down one day, just go to the orphanage and bully an orphan because what is he going to do about it? He has no parents.
Location is in London by the way.
One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money.
His friend: "Oh for once you lost some pounds!"
Three copycats on a boat, one jumps off. How many are left? Zero, because they're copycats!
Why can’t orphans get in trouble?
Because there’s no one to give a phone call home to.