Occupation jokes
Parademic
I think the pollen count is a difficult job. Especially if you have hay fever.
The toughest job I ever had was when I was selling doors, door-to-door.
Why couldn't the cowboy go to the rodeo?
He forgot his calves!
I am really hot, but I hate water. What am I?
What's black, long and full of seamen?
A submarine.
The DNA told the tailor he couldn't find his genes.
Why are the candy's clothes in the studio?
Because it's a wrapper.
What's a chairmaker's favorite flavor?
Chair-y.
What do you call a fish that can use a katana?
A salmon-rai.
How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?
Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.
Why does Zac say he works at McDonald's? Because Aaron go errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
A chemical store burned down, and the firefighter just stood there, but at the end, the store fire just went out by itself. But the store owner still got angry.
Store owner: Why didn't you take out the fire?
Firefighter: Yeah, but it went out by itself.
Store owner: But still, why?
Firefighter: Your chemical store sells H20.
Store owner: Oh, I get it now!
Why did the clown stop smiling?
Someone chopped his lips off.
What did the lion say to the lion tamer? Nothing, because when the lion tamer whipped the lion, the lion killed him.
A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone.
The doctor should attend the sick and leave the well alone!
Why did the rapper become a barber?
To give everyone FRESH CUTS.
What do you call a pole dancer?
A stripper.
Yo mama so short, she went to see Santa and he told her to get back to work!
What do you call a Barbie doll that’s wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 😷