Numbers jokes
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 and 976 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone, and money falls out.
Why do teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
Alfonso's mom is so fat that she stepped on the scale and the doctor said, "Oh shit, that's my phone number!"
Why is 10 afraid? Because it is in the middle of 9/11.
Why did Michael Jackson die?
Because I have a new phone number, and he does not know.
Patient number 14 was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma—a type of skin cancer. Pretty ironic how he travels. He went to terminal 14.
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
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What's tree plus tree? Sticks! (Three plus three equals six).
What's tree plus tree? Sticks! (Three plus three = six)
Why don’t Asians use phones?
Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!
"Gotta number one victory royale."
Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.
Ok ok ok so 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
You know how 7 ate 9? Why was 10 scared? It's because he was in the middle of 9/11. 🤣
You're so fat that when you got on the scales, they said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
Best thing ever right here.
So, there is this app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12-15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12-15 inches longer.
Best pick up line EVER.
There is an app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12 to 15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12 to 15 inches longer.
Random guy: Hi, how old are you?
Me: 15
The guy: You're so young, age is just a number.
Me: Do you know what else is a number?
The guy: What?
Me: 911
Six was scared of seven because 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because he was caught between 9/11.
There was a person inside who needed help from the police, but the police changed their number, so he ordered a party with pizzas from 2 airplanes, but the pilots were stupid, so they put people instead of pizzas, and one landed on the 93rd floor and the 94th floor, literally.