Numbers jokes
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9!!!
Why is 6 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
A woman comes to the doctor and tells her, "Doctor, my husband wants intense sex all day, what should I give him?" The doctor says, "My number."
You know what’s odd?
Every other number.
The lady was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale responded with, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
What do you call 8 x 3.14?
Octopi.
A woman noticed her husband standing on a bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. "Ha! That's not going to help!" she said. "Sure it does," he said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers."
What is Hawking's number one song? The Beach Boys: "I Get Around."
What's 72?
69 with 3 people watching.
Number 1 ventriloquist dies at age 76, will be mist.
Me, a Chinese woman, and her BFF walked into a bar. I asked the Chinese girl for her number. She said, “Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!” I said, “Wow!”
Then her friend said, “She means 666-3629.”
What do a pedophile and a clock have in common? Neither of them go past 12.
What’s the best thing about 28 year olds?
There’s 20 of them.
Why is 6 afraid of 7? Nothing, because numbers don’t have consciences.
A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says, "uno, dos..." and poof! He disappears without a tres.
Where do mathematicians go to die?
The symmetry.
62 is not just any number, as it so happens to be my height, 6'2", just as 25 is my age on Facebook.
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
Why is 5 afraid of 7? Because 6, 7, 8.