Not jokes

Why did Sarah call off the swing? Because she has no arms.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

When Caesar’s wife told him she dreamed he should beware the Ides of March, he scoffed and said, “What? It’s not like I’m gonna be stabbed 23 times by my best buddies!”

FRIEND: Hey, want to come to my house?

LONELY ORPHAN/TRUMP: Want to come to my orphange?

FRIEND: Dude, I'm blocking you!

LONELY ORPHAN: :(

God- make a grumpy old man president.

Angel- why?

G- cause I said so-name him Trump.

A- okay.

G- make him not pay taxes.

A- okay...

Fast forward to 2020

G- you know that grumpy old man?

A- yea...

G- make him create a deadly virus named after a beer.

A- Krona.

G- exactly.

A- why do you hate humans so much?

G- because I can.

If I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn because they are Beautiful, Majestic, Sparkly, Bright, Gods. They create Joy and Happiness everywhere they go.

Unicorns made my life better when I got to know them more. ^-^ They filled my life with more Happiness. I believe in the Unicorns, and they'll believe in me. I am not a Unicorn, although I am the Princess of the Unicorn Land, but if I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn! :P

When do you go at stop and stop when done?

I don't know, I'm not a pedophile.

What did Goodlife Fitness say to LA Fitness? "I guess it's just not 'working out'!"

What if Hitler did not say "bombs away," he said "lambs are slayed?"

My hairline may be straight, but I’m not.

People who wannabe rich and famous rappers should always look at Tekashi 6ix9ine, and learn what not to do.

Knock knock? Who's there? Kanga. Kanga who? Not kangawho, kangaroo!

9/11 was a round of Clash of Clans. They knocked down two towers, not three.

What can you catch, but not throw?

These are not funny. Those that are adopted feel hurt by these!

You shall feel ashamed of yourself!

Take the L! - Losers

Yo mama so fat, when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight, not your phone number.”

Depression jokes are like food... not every people get it.

Jokes are not funny.

Why did the terrorists crash?

They were doing the job they loved but not getting paid.

Lol.

Lol, this joke may not be funny, but what do you call your mom fat and emo?

I love these orphan jokes. It's not like they're gonna go tell their parents. ☠