Q. Why is Stephen Hawking so good at air guitar?
A. Because he has excellent string theory.
Have you ever heard of the eye tear?
Me either.
What do you call an elephant and a rhino mix?
Helliphino!
Cancer
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Your life? Wanna hear a sadder one?
My life.
Wanna hear a joke about corn?
Never mind, it's too corny.
Want to hear a joke about pizza?
Never mind, it's too cheesy.
If seagulls fly over the sea, what flies over the bay?
Bagels.
Why can't you tell a joke in a corn maze?
Because there's too many ears.
An apple a day, or you'll die anyway.
Wanna hear a joke? You.
They struggled to lift the weights, but I got watermelon to keep me in shape.
A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."
Nurse: Don't worry, I'm great with babies. Parents: You are? Nurse: Yeah, I always abort them. Parent:... Parent: You're hired.
Jacob has a small penis.
Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face as you climax.
Man, my Muslim friend's the bomb!
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.
Geology rocks!
pussi
