Worst Jokes Ever
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!
What do you call a Russian prostitute? Slobadown Mycockyoubitch.
What do you call a Lesbian Dinosaur?
A Doyoulickalotapuss.
So, I got a paper towel roll, ripped it, but started to fart when I ripped it off, and stopped farting when I got it off the roll, and then I said, "I guess that's why it's called ripping one!"
A letter to all Math:
Dear Math,
Grow up and solve your own problems!
2x6= DO IT YOURSELF!!!!
Sara's Mom was helping her prepare for her driver's test.
Mom: "Okay, any questions?"
Sara: "Yes. I actually don't know what "yield" means."
Mom: "Don't worry, Hon. No one does."
A lumberjack goes to a person's house.
Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.
What did the kid with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves!
Just kidding, he hasnāt opened it yet.
Everyone reading this is gay!
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"
My son asked me to stop singing Oasis songs in public. I said maybe.
How do you plan a party in outer space?
You planet.
See, I was always told puns are funny.
But I can see now they aren't punny.
Swallow cum, not gum.
A priest and a pedophile walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Jim!"
What do you call a bad pun?
The pun is not punny!
An old Indian was buried on the side of a hill. What did he say?
Nothing, he was dead.
Three Indians get captured by an enemy leader, and the leader says, "Go in the woods and find 10 fruits of the same kind."
The first one comes back with apples. The enemy leader says, "Shove them up your butt and don't make a sound, or I will kill you." He gets to two and yells. The leader kills him. He goes up to heaven.
The second guy comes back and has grapes. He gets to 9 and laughs. The leader kills him. He goes to heaven.
The first guy asks the second guy why he laughed, saying he had it in the bag. The second guy said he saw the third guy carrying pineapples.
Student: What's the best thing in the world?
Teacher: I don't know what.
Student: Hard rock cock.
The undertaker's famous saying is "Rest In Peace" to all of his opponents, but really they don't rest in peace. The only peace they get is from God.